how to fit bodybuilding into your life as a new parent

✅ Automate where possible.

✅ Do less in the gym.

✅ Sleep when possible and work on your mental game.

✅ Be present and enjoy the journey.

1) adjust your expectations of progress.

Seek to maximize what you can in the context of your situation, but it is not the time to push a diet or expect maximum muscle growth. Instead, bring components of your plan to maintenance and your expectations. You just had a kid, you're no longer JUST a bodybuilder or spouse, etc. You’re a PARENT. It is the most important job in the whole world and one you’ll have to learn about as you go. Accept that things will be forever different. Not worse - just different.

2) automate where possible.

You will have less time, energy, and mental resources. Your fuse will be shorter with those around you and you will forever forget what it feels to “be bored.” Your goal is to create consistency in the chaos. Automate and make your systems as efficient as possible. Make meal prep easy, use a grocery delivery service like Instacart to cut down on time spent shopping, hire a coach to control your fitness/nutrition programming, pay someone to clean your house, etc. Get things OFF your plate, or at least make them easier to do.

3) do less in the gym.

Your recovery will suck, at least early on. Per point #1, don't expect to make massive amounts of progress The most surefire way to burn out is to keep forcing yourself to be able to train and recover how you used to. That burnout leads to even LESS progress and potential injury You can do as little as ⅓ of what you were doing in terms of volume and not lose your hard-earned muscle. I will write a whole article on how to adjust training when being a new parent, but remember — be okay with less.

4) sleep when possible and work on your mental game.

Stress will be high, sleep will be poor, and you’ll overall likely be on edge more than ever before. All of this is not an ideal environment for being the best version of yourself. In fact, lack of sleep is even worse in many cases for your health than simply not training and leads to worse outcomes like elevated stress, poor food choices, depression/anxiety, weight gain, etc. It will feel like freedom when your kid finally starts to go to sleep on time every night, and you will have the urge to stay up and “take that power back” so to speak. RESIST THAT URGE. Don't stay up. Go to bed. You'll be a better functioning parent, significant other, bodybuilder, employee, etc if you do.

Regarding your mental state, you HAVE to make a conscious effort to be aware of how your current “gas tank” affects your mood and responsiveness to others. Find ways to fill up your tank mentally and physically. Don’t make it worse than you have to. Don’t subject your S.O. and kid to that version of yourself.

5) Be present and enjoy the journey.

This one is easier said than done. It’s easy to get caught up in survival mode and feel like you're just trying to make it hour to hour. Your energy is shot, training sucks, you start to wonder if this was all worth it, and hope the time flies by so you can feel like yourself again. What’s ironic is that when it is all said and done, those moments you wished would be over will be the ones you wish you had back, and without all of those moments, you wouldn’t be half the person you are today.

bonus tip #6: create a community that understands what you’re going through and will keep you accountable.

Meet other gym rats with kids. This is an industry where it seems like more high-level competitors, fit-fluencers, etc don't have kids than do. And in my experience, that's 100% the case. But that makes you just that much more dynamic of a person. So find others in a similar situation and build relationships with them. Having people around you who are/have been in your shoes makes it easier to navigate and ride the waves of parenthood. And when in doubt, hire it out. Hire a coach who understands your unique circumstances, and the demands that are on you mentally and physically day-to-day so the plan can be adjusted with all the correct variables considered.

Conclusion

As a new parent (and parents in general regardless of your kid’s age), you will have good days, bad days, and even worse days. But you will also have the most amazing days you’ve ever had and feel feelings you never thought possible. Remember, IT WILL GET BETTER. Time will pass and you will find a rhythm and you will be able to get back to some badass progression in the gym and life (and it’s true when they say it's always easier the second time around).

P.S. Just to add a little credibility to what I’m saying above, above are my comparisons at 11 months post-baby #1 versus 11 months post-baby #2. Same weight in both pics (238lbs AM), but the one on the right is much happier (the beard makes me look more PO’d than I am lol), healthier, and more successful in all areas of life. I still am not where I want to be physique-wise, but I am in a significantly better spot than I was the first time around at the same point. Don’t make the same mistakes I did!

If you need help navigating your fitness and physique goals as a new or expecting parent, we are here to help! We’ve been through it a time or two.

Set up a discovery call here.